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Doors Closing Hopefully Lead To Other Doors Opening

It's the Christmas season and I just put up my tree. Sometimes I think, why the Hell am I doing this? I never have anyone over to my cave. Sure it's pretty but all the decorations remind me of previous parts of my life, especially ex-boyfriends. I still hang them on the boughs of my fake tree, perhaps an acceptance of every twist and turn of my life. It's sad from a certain angle, that I am alone at my age, but I know it's my choice. I have noticed that I am attracting the opposite sex and I enjoy the attention. For some reason, these men that are buzzing around are not capable of asking me out. Sure, I could do them the honours, but I still want to be courted, like every gal. 

I was sad to hear that one of my suitors will not be around as much, for good reasons, as he purchased a new home, on the east side of town. Moving out of the West End will limit his visits of course, and also, lower the chance of him actually getting enough courage to ask me out. He is kind of a quirky guy, funny and nerdy, but cute nonetheless. He will be moving at the end of the month. In the back of my mind, I heard a door shut...

Another past lover/friend has already moved away, but we speak once and a while, saying we will hook up when he returns on his visits. Unfortunately, he has gathered a special someone in his new life, thus making it more awkward than it was before, considering he is married. I am happy for him but also selfishly disappointed, as a night of debauchery is out of the question now. There's that sound again, another door shutting...

So with all these doors shutting in the back of my mind, I wonder if I am even able to hear doors opening in my life. I am pretty bored with my love life, or rather lack of it, and people around me are having babies, getting married, doing all the things that have somehow avoided my path. Every year I say, this is the year I will find that special someone. I'm starting to not believe my own words. I wonder if there is anyone out there strong enough to handle me?

I will always stay positive, a romantic at heart. There's always a JCM song to cover any mood or predicament I am in. Here's a song I am living by right now. "Good Love Is On The Way'. The lyrics are pretty much working for me right now. Maybe for Christmas Santa can bring me some "colour in my world'. Merry Christmas!!!!


I'm a lazy lover

Undercover

Wasting time
Then one day this summer
I changed my number
To cut my line

Good love is on the way
I been lonely but I know, I'll be ok
Good love is on the way

3 years broken hearted
But now her ghost is finally gone
I'm done with broken people
This is me
I'm working on (cause I know)

Good love is on the way
I've been lonely but I know, I'll be ok
Good love is on the way

Good to go for wherever I'm needed
Bags are packed and I'm
Down by the door
You can take all the tricks up my sleeve
I don't need them anymore

Good to go for wherever I'm needed
Bags are packed and I'm
Down by the door
You can take all the tricks up my sleeve
I don't need them anymore

Good love is on the way
I've been lonely, lonely, lonely, yeah
Good love is on the way
I've been lonely but I know I'll be ok
Good love is on the way
Oh, Good love is on the way, hey


Jen McIntyre | Create your badge

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